Cry for you . Because i am a jealous man .

Tonight is Fahrenheit’s Battle of the Bands FINALS .

COME COME COME !

DONT MISS IT !

Cry For you .

I was at my cell group the other day , my cell leader asked me an interesting question ..

“Is it easier for you to rejoice with others or to weep with others ?” followed by .

“Is it easy to rejoice with others when it affects you ?”

Well , at first . My reaction was …
Of course it is easier to weep with others lah ! When people are crying and feeling sad takkan you go laugh at the feller ?
Like when i watch movies , happy endings are like .yea yea , whatever ..NORMAL OK.

And when it comes to the part (especially romantic movies) and the chick or hero guy dies . you feel the pain . awwwww…so sad . LOL . *One thing about me is i like to put ALOT OF emotions when i watch a movie or listen to a music . I suggest you do the same , that is the ultimate secret to GET THE FEEL VIBRATO AND BENDS ! Its from within. Not a technique that you learn.

The last movie i nearly cibai cried was The Curious Case of Benjamin Button .

I watched it on the way to U.S , no its not nice to get all emo on the plane .

Back to the topic , I bet most of you will agree with me , it is easier to weep with others right ?

The reason why we cannot rejoice with others . Is because of jealousy ..

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You see , jealousy is a very powerful emotion .
People do crazy things over jealousy . People KILL , Steal and lie over jealousy .

Countless of wars were fought , over Jealousy .
Family members split , over Jealousy .
Boy hangs himself , over Jealousy .
Couples that you thought will last forever , broke up , over Jealousy .
Brother kill brother , over Jealousy .
The first murder in the Bible , Cain and Able , happened over Jealousy .

God warned us about this emotion , from the very beginning .

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I was talking to a friend the other day . He shared about how we humans couldn’t stand or accept the fact that SOMEBODY ELSE is getting a better deal than them .

There was a group of researchers who did an experiment in a third world country .

The Subject : 2 hard labor workers , and A FREE 100 USD for them .

Worker A suppose to decide how the money should be split , whether is 80/20 ? 60/40? etc .

Worker B decides whether the money is distributed to both of them , or neither of them get any money .

The shocking results was , it wasn’t possible . Both of them just couldn’t agree on any amount .

Worker A who had the power to split , would obviously take advantage of the situation and offer 20/80 or 30/70.

Worker B says , “this is unfair , you’re trying to get more of the money . And i would rather see neither of us get any money, than to see you get more money than me and to go through with this unfair situation.

The Bigger picture:

The amazing thing was , the average wage in a third world country at that time was actually 3 USD a day .

So even if they agreed on 70/30 , the guy who gets the smaller pie , which is 30 USD is actually earning 10 times more than what he was supposed to earn . But over jealousy , it didn’t matter how much he earned , but how much he gets and how much his peers gets .

One would walk away from a 10 times salary for FREE , Just because he couldn’t stand the idea that another person could get a better deal than them.

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So Why do humans get jealous ?
Insecurity .

Sounds familiar ?

On that night in my cell group . Many of us answered “to weep with others”
Are we insecure ?
Are we so full of ourselves ?

Maybe .

But there was one person , who answered ” To rejoice with others”
At first i was like..“WTF ,she talking cock trying to show off is it ? “

And the best part was , She couldn’t see the situation like how everybody else did . It was like a religion . She kept telling us , “i cannot imagine me weeping with somebody else . Why should i be sad just because they are sad ? i would encourage people who are sad  “

I thought she was a like a lost kid , delusional ..As if she havent tasted any PAIN or suffering from life before..you know , its a wild world .

I drove home . Thought about it . There are so many things in my life , money , career , girlfriend , car , house , class , education , lifestyle , friends that we would get JEALOUS about ..right ?

The problem with us is , We humans like to COMPARE.

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Once , a female friend told me “If there aren’t any women left on this planet , shopping and getting the best man wouldn’t be fun anymore” LOL

Then i stopped and thought about guitar playing.I began to see things different.The whole thing changed my perspective .

That delusional girl at my cell group started to made sense.I figured it out.I finally “got it”.

When i teach my students , or chat with a customers .

they often tell me shit like ” dude , i just can’t do it . I’ve been playing for 5 years and i see no progress bla bla bla rant rant rant rant “

or tell me shit like “dude , look at my other friend player B , i played for 5 years , he played for 2 years but we are almost the same standard KNS bla bla bla bla rant rant rant rant “

Then i will go like .” aiyoh ..just enjoy the process lahhhhh…why la need to improve want be guitar hero ..music enjoy maaa…be happy , see you only learn for 2 years of shred you can shred so well”

Of course , deep inside me , i was thinking..“wtf..u think i your girlfriend free to rant is it ? go pick another person and suck their energy off lah “

LOL ..

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But when a student , or a friend that i havent seen for quite some time ..suddenly shows massive improvement ..

I am like ..“hey ! ..you improved ! i am so happy for you ! “
Did i mention that nothing is more beautiful than seeing my own student , playing better than me , being more mature than me?

Why ? because i stop comparing . I stop competing .
And i realized , i feel better this way .

Healthy competition is fine . But if a competition is driven by Hate , EGO , Jealousy , Insecurity and FEAR . I would rather not enter the competitor , remain the same and stop improving .

My 2010’s resolution is , i wanna kill of as many fear , hate , jealousy and insecurities that i have in my life . I wanna learn how to rejoice with others , i wanna be happy for my peers , my competitors and my enemies .

So , what about you ?

Is it easier for you to rejoice with others or to weep with others ?